When I was younger I had a huge anger problem. I could never feel better or calm down unless I broke something or felt the pain of my fist hitting a wall. I eventually, with alot of therapy, grew out of it and became unfamiliar with "loss of control". I mean, I've felt extreme anger, but not that kind that takes over my entire fucking body. Tonight was such bullshit. I broke my mouse, spilled fresca all over my desk and cracked my computer screen. I don't know whats happening to me but all my old habits seem to be resurfacing. My anger, my irritability, my sadness. I just realize now that I'm not doing anything with my life and it has absolutely no value to speak of. I'm an idiot. INITIATE SELF DESTRUCTION GO!